I thought hiring a young caregiver for my 82-year-old mom would finally give me a chance to breathe easier—until a strange pattern on their Sunday walks and a short clip of doorbell audio made me realize something was happening between them that nobody had told me about.
I’m 58, have been married for 33 years, raised three kids into adults, and somehow still got completely caught off guard by my own life, like some over-the-top drama.People think things quiet down once the kids leave home. In reality, the noise just shifts. Fewer cries of “Mom, where’s my backpack?” and more questions like “Mom, have you thought about long-term care insurance or a medical power of attorney?”
I teach high school English. I run on coffee, teenage angst, and essays about symbolism that definitely isn’t there. My husband, Harlan, is an electrical engineer—reliable, practical, the type who can fix the dishwasher at 10 p.m. and still be up at 6 a.m. packing his lunch.We were heading toward that empty-nest stage with a sense of relief.
And then there’s my mother.Mom is 82. Her mind is still sharp enough to cut you with one perfectly timed remark, but her body is letting her down. In January, she slipped in her kitchen, fell, and broke her hip. Suddenly, the fiercely independent woman who used to mow her own lawn was stuck in a recliner, counting pain pills.
My father passed at 73 from a sudden stroke. One moment he was debating with me about whether I graded too strictly; the next, he was gone. He’d worked hard his entire life and left Mom comfortable—farmland, investments, the house they’d lived in for 40 years. Everyone in our small town knew she was quietly well-off, even though she still bought store-brand cereal.