I remember the promise I made to myself on the drive to the daycare that morning. I would keep it together. I would smile, unpack supplies, greet the children, and act like a woman who had moved forward with her life.Five years had passed since the day I was told my twin daughters died shortly after birth. Five years since the hospital room where the doctor spoke gently and avoided my eyes. Five years since the silence that followed the words “They didn’t make it.”
Grief had settled into my life like a permanent shadow. It was quieter now, but never gone.
So I told myself I wouldn’t cry on my first day.
I was arranging colored markers and construction paper on a small table when the morning group arrived. Children’s voices filled the hallway, a familiar mixture of laughter and nervous chatter.Two little girls walked in holding hands.
They had dark curls and round cheeks, the kind of confidence children sometimes carry without realizing it. I smiled automatically.
Then I really looked at them.
Something inside my chest tightened.
They reminded me of childhood photos of myself—something about the shape of their faces, the way they moved, the slight tilt of their heads when they glanced around the room.Then the taller girl stopped.
She stared at me like someone who had just recognized a long-lost face. Her sister bumped into her from behind, confused.
Both of them looked directly at me.